Thursday 28 July 2011

Splendour In The Bar: Kanye West Sideshow Edition



SPLENDOUR IN THE BAR: KANYE WEST SIDESHOW EDITION!
AUGUST 6 // TRANSIT BAR // FREE!

Yo BYRON BAY, I'm really happy for Y'all, and I'mma let you finish, But the STRANGEWAYS DJS are gonna do the best SPLENDOUR IN THE BAR of ALL TIME! OF ALL TIME!

That's right - The third annual SPLENDOUR IN THE BAR is here! And we hear your feedback from previous years so this year we are bringing:

A SYNTHETIC GRASS DANCEFLOOR! A FULL HOUR of NON-STOP KANYE WEST FROM MIDNIGHT to 1AM! A 2 HOUR SPLENDOUR ARTISTS MEGAMIX! Plus the awesome audio-visual spectacle that is The STRANGEWAYS DJS, ARCHITECT AND EDDIE SHAGZ! CAN WE GET MUCH HIGHER?

Now watch as we include (almost) every SPLENDOUR ARTIST in a ridiculously long-winded press release!

Feed your (JANE'S) ADDICTION without getting THE HIVES as we PULP the fruits of the SPLENDOUR LINEUP to bring you the (BLUE) JUICE!
You'd need your own personal THEIVERY CORPORATION (or even have to CUT OFF YOUR HANDS and sell them) to afford SPLENDOUR TICKETS. But you'll never be one of the HUNGRY KIDS OF HUNGARY at SPLENDOUR IN THE BAR - it's FREE!

OH MERCY - you won't even need to use FLIGHT FACILITIES to get there!

Don't chill your ELBOWs in the ESKIMO (JOE)-like COLD(PLAY) DRAPHT of the SPLENDOUR CAMPSITE. You may become a GHOUL or fade away to a (DJ) SHADOW. So come to SPLENDOUR IN THE BAR instead - it will be as warm as THE MIDDLE EAST in the cozy confines of the TRANSIT BAR!

Need to suddenly PNAU? Don't PANIC(S)! You won't be tempted to YELLE and have FITZ AND (THE) TANTRUMS because of THE HERD waiting for toilets, or embarass yourself by using THE GRATES outside - there's plenty of toilets at TRANSIT! You won't even have to AJAX all your dirty clothes afterwards!

We are MODEST (MOUSE) DJS who FOSTER (THE PEOPLE) a FRIENDLY (FIRES), HOLIDAY(S)-like atmosphere of GROUPLOVE that even CHILDREN (COLLIDE) would enjoy! You won't meet your (LIVING) END from WILD BEASTS and GUINEAFOWL with MUSCLES and WARPAINT at SPLENDOUR IN THE BAR, we can guarantee it!

So come, shake your D-CUP and have a (ASTON) SHUFFLE on the dancefloor! it will be LIGHT YEARS better than the real thing!

Monday 4 July 2011

I BELIEVE I CAN STRANGEWAYS - this friday night!

 
I BELIEVE I CAN STRANGEWAYS!
TRANSIT BAR // FRIDAY JULY 8 // FREE!

Get ready for THE BEST YOU EVER HAD as THE STRANGEWAYS DJs return from their ivory tower in MELBOURNE to entertain the huddled masses of CANBERRA!

HIT THE ROAD, JACK, and 1, 2 STEP with us into the ever-changing, booty-shaking world of RHYTHM AND BLUES!
Give your WEEKND the IGNITION (REMIX) that it needs by getting ALL SHOOK UP to CLASSIC (and not-so-classic) R’N’B hits while watching TRAPPED IN MY CLOSET!

To ALL THE SINGLE LADIES: WHAT’S YOUR FLAVA? You might just meet someone IN THE MIDNIGHT HOUR!

TO MY FELLAS: if you meet your LUCILLE or LONG TALL SALLY, why don’t you just TRY A LITTLE TENDERNESS? Then say “I WOULD DIE 4 U!” (You can THANK ME LATER!)

So if you only ever do 1 THING, make sure that you come down to the TRANSIT BAR on JULY 8 for I BELIEVE I CAN STRANGEWAYS! YEAH!